Thursday, October 4, 2012

What if It's Not a Girl...

I am currently doubting the ultrasound determining the gender of this baby...

I don't know why...I can't seem to accept that it is a girl. I mean...they aren't 100% when they do these things...and although it looked like a girl...I just don't know...maybe I was secretly hoping for a boy and can't get over it...

It hasn't helped that when I go for my regular check-ups now, the heart rate is considered a boy rate (which is slightly slower than a girls)...and it has much so that the nurses have asked if I'm having a boy...not much of a confidence booster there!!!

One of the nurses told me that is an old wives tale...but most of my pregnancy symptoms have been similar to my pregnancy with Brennan instead of Bella, which was why we went into our ultrasound convinced that we were having a boy!!

I'm at 35 1/2 weeks. I could go into labor in a week and a half and have a full-term, healthy baby.

And, of course thanks to this wonderful preggo insomnia, I'm awake at 5 am (and have been for over an hour now)...and this "feeling" of uncertainty is driving me crazy! And I really have no one to talk to about this paranoia! :)

I'm even looking into the imaging centers in Denver to have another ultrasound done!!! (OK, so I'm not really going to get one...but I'm thinking about it!)

And part of...ok, all of the pressure I'm feeling is brought upon myself...I am in control of how I respond to these feelings...and I shouldn't let anyone else be the determining factor of how I feel...

Getting things ready...having a name picked out...what to bring to the hospital.

Really, none of that matters. I'm not a huge fan of "gender neutral" things, but what I already have has been used by both my little girl and little boy - except for the plethora of clothes that were mostly given to us.

Either way it goes, this baby will be fed, clothed, and have a place to sleep...which is pretty much all that is required. And I am sure I'll go into labor naturally...and I have no clue whatsoever when that will be...

And I plan on bringing girl and boy clothes to the hospital with us. Last 2 times I lucked out...well, kinda...

Bella was so tiny...the clothes that I had brought for her were all too big...even the newborn dress she came home in was big on her!

So, I assumed that Brennan would be a small baby. Not at all. I just remember rolls everywhere. The first thing I said when they laid him on me was, "Oh my, that's a big baby..." And the clothes I had brought for him were too small! I had one outfit that fit him, luckily...or he would have come home naked! :)

Anyways, this baby Blakney #3 has been a surprise all the way around. God has a purpose and a plan for all of this...the pregnancy, the baby, our family...even to the point of timing...I'll be having a baby around the same time that I had a miscarriage last year...and I believe God's timing and will are perfect...

So, I know that this is not worth stressing about.

If you are thinking of sending a gift or something to us...diapers and gift cards are much appreciated!! I do plan on finishing our registry at Babies R Us this week. There will be quite a few gender neutral things on it - just in case!!

And we don't mind at all if you wait until after the baby is born to pick it out!


  1. This may sound a bit crazy but it worked. Because of the energy in our bodies and the way that the lead counteracts it works....take a sharpened pencil, threaded needle and stick the threaded needle into the eraser of the pencil. Hold the thread and dangle the tip of the pencil just above the wrist (inside of the wrist facing up) if the pencil goes in a circle it is a girl and if it goes in straight line back and forth it is a boy. Has worked on everyone I have ever seen it done on...even myself. Worth a try anyway....even just for fun.

    1. thanks! I may just have to try that!!! :) It's much cheaper than another ultrasound!!!!