Thursday, June 27, 2013

A Teachable Moment:: How to Deal with Disappointment

I have found my newest role in motherhood is teaching Bella how to deal with disappointment.

There are going to be times in life when things don't go the way she wants them to.

Disappointment is a natural part of life. Even the Bible refers to it.

Proverbs 13:12

New Living Translation (NLT)
12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
    but a dream fulfilled is a tree of life.

I know that I don't always deal with disappointment appropriately...

And I know that she's watching me.

Yesterday we went to our church's playdate group. It was at a swimming pool...the sun was shining, the water felt great...
this is from our first Connection Church playdate

We played for an hour and a half.

Brennan had eaten all of our snacks and was tired...Breelee was tired...but Bella wasn't ready to go.

We were the first family to leave.

And that was devastating for Bella. Absolutely devastating.

She cried. A real, genuine cry.

I tried to empathize with her...I told her that I understood that she was disappointed. I understood that it was ok to cry.

But her loud ceaseless crying in the car was waking up her baby sister...and to have 2 crying girls in the car would have been too much for me in that moment.

We got home...ate lunch...and she mostly recovered.

Later, she apologized for crying about leaving the pool.

Her tender heart amazes me.

I told her that I appreciated it...I understood she was disappointed...but it was important for her to listen to me when I say it is time to go.

Honestly, I could have given in to her...I could have let her have her way and let her stay...I could have turned the stroller around and said, "Ok, Bella, since you are crying and so thoroughly disappointed, we will stay the extra 5 minutes until everyone else leaves."

But that wouldn't have taught her an accurate way to deal with disappointment. It would have just showed her that if she cries enough...if she shows enough disappointment...if she throws a fit...she can get her way.

But that's not how I want her to grow up. I want her to learn how to move on when it is time to...

I am the one who sets the boundaries...not her...It is my role as her mom.

Today, she has recovered. She's playing. She's learning. She's growing.

She is learning that it is ok to cry...but she's also learning that she cannot get her way all of the time. It is not fun...but she will be a better person because of it.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Blakney Family Update June 2013

Life is moving very quickly! This weekend makes 1 year since we've moved to Colorado!!!!

So much has happened!

Breelee is now 7 months old. Can't believe it. She's grown so much...she's sitting up on her own. She's eating big girl food. She's still sleeping great. Just unbelievable how fast it's gone by!

Breelee loves loves loves her brother and sister...they can make her laugh like no one else! And she loves her daddy too...she gets soooo excited when he gets home from work!

It is delightful to see her personality develop. And I cannot tell you how many compliments we get about her being a happy baby...yet answer to prayer!

Brennan is potty-trained! He decided almost 2 weeks ago that he was done with diapers...he came home from church on Sunday and used the little potty and hasn't wanted to wear a diaper since. Yes, we've dealt with accidents, but he's getting better. And he's only had a couple of accidents during the night - he wears his big boy drawers to bed and keeps them dry! It is crazy to think that I haven't had to change his diaper in almost 2 weeks...

I mean, I've had to clean up his accidents, but before I know it...I won't have to clean those up either.

He is so funny...definitely all boy...rough and tough...but loves his momma! :) He has an amazing vocabulary and regularly asks to go back to Meme's house in Louisiana!

Bella is doing awesome. She is growing taller by the day! She finished prek at her amazing school...and we are debating on keeping her there next year (our other option is homeschooling...which if it doesn't begin this fall, we will begin the next one!!)

I've been working with her to learn to read...she's excited about it, and she can already read some short books! She has such a love for reading, which is an answer to prayers!

She still loves to sing and dance, which we hear and see all the time. She is sweet and sassy...and so much like me it is unreal. She is a helpful big sister...and I am so proud of the developing little lady she is becoming.

Her faith is growing in God...and that is beautiful to be a part of!

Our family is doing well. Lee is still working part-time with Apple. He doesn't have a "regular" schedule since he is part-time...and he doesn't always get a lot of hours, but we are praying that he will get to go "full-time" soon! That would be HUGE for our family!

We are so thankful for our support team members who continue to help us with their prayers and financial support. God is using you to provide for us...and we are blessed. A lot of times money is tight, but God takes such good care of meeting our needs!!

The church is doing great! I'm about to lead a women's online Bible study for our ladies, which I am sooooo excited about!! Plus I'm getting to plan some fun activities for the summer! I'm still helping teach kids church, running media occasionally, and singing on the worship team...but I'm also about to help more in the nursery...which I'm looking forward to loving on those babies!

Lee is doing great with the music and media. He doesn't have a ton of time to devote to meeting and finding new musicians to relieve those who are playing...but our team is dedicated to leading worship on Sunday mornings! We are so blessed to have them at Connection Church!

For those of you reading this, thank you for loving on our family. Thanks for praying for us and believing in us and with us. Thank you for encouraging us...even if you didn't know we even needed it! :)