Confident - Not Insecure

It's a great feeling when Lee & I are on the same page.

It's hard when we are not on the same page or even in the same book...

Miscommunication is one of the most frustrating parts of our marriage. 

It's not that we are not communicating, we are just not communicating correctly. 

I have found that I get super defensive when we talk about things that I'm insecure about. 

Hyper-defensive. 

And that is a hard habit for me to change. 

I have to almost remove myself from the conversation...

Lee graciously points out, "I'm not attacking you...I'm just saying..."

It's still hard for me. I still get defensive even when I know he's not attacking me. 

And it all boils down to me being insecure. 

And boy am I insecure about certain things...

And I feel like I have to prove to Lee that I'm right...justify my actions or thoughts.

Communication is hard for me. I'd rather write about it or think about it...but to verbally put it into words is not my favorite thing to do.

I know that Lee is for me, not against me. He wants me to win, to succeed in life. And I know that he wants that for our marriage and family too.

I just need to get over myself. To be open and honest with myself and with him. To let down my guard and look at the bigger picture of things instead of looking at my own insecurities.

I want to improve in this area! I don't want to stay the same!! I want to change, to be a better wife and communicator with the man who loves me so deeply. I want to be able to walk through my insecurities with him - knowing that he cares for me...and he loves me the way that I am...and he sees the woman I am beyond my insecurities. And that is the woman he wants me to be - confident and not insecure.

I am so blessed to have a husband who pushes me beyond what I am to what God has created me to be. I am empowered to be a confident woman because of the confident man walking along side me with his hand on the small of my back.