Shoulda Coulda Woulda

Should have...

Could have...

Would have...

These statements haunt me.

They are stifling to me. Make my mind go in circles. A lot of circles.

And I live in this imaginary world of embarrassment and humiliation when I am going in these circles...even though no one is aware of it!! It doesn't matter to anyone else. No one else is thinking that I should have/could have done something differently than the way I did it...and even if they are, it's not a big deal!!

Yet, I allow these words to stop me.

It's that thing of me having to feel like I'm perfect. I just need to get over myself. And that is easier said than done.

I trap myself, though, by focusing either on the past or the future. It causes me to take my eyes of off what is happening now.

Sure I can change things next time around, but I don't need to focus on it to remember it...or spend my time waiting for that next time to come around.

Today is calling me. I am still growing, changing, developing, learning...

I cannot go back to change something that has taken place.

I cannot zoom ahead either.

I have to live today. I want to live today - I don't want to miss out on it.

Dr. Best (a psychologist) once told me that I need to lighten up. To not be so serious. To play more.

I waste so much of my time taking myself too seriously. I really do need to loosen up. There's too much happening around me that I need to start enjoying.

So, I will leave my imaginary world of embarrassment and humiliation and embrace today.

(I didn't realize Dr. Les Parrott had an audio book about this!! - may be looking into it soon!!!)