Binge Watching The Office

I love watching the Office with Lee Blakney.

Our love of this started about 7 years ago when our friend Amanda (Meadows) Gravely gave us the season on DVD to watch...

I was preggo...and huge...

And we lived in a little apartment in Lafayette.

A few times a week, Lee and I would go back to our tiny apartment for lunch, and we would watch a few episodes of The Office before going back to the cafe for the afternoon. We would also watch several episodes at night. This was true binge watching before Netflix was around.

Every time we hear the theme song now, Lee and I look at each other and smile.

And funny enough...when Bella was smaller, she would stop and smile every time she heard the theme song too. It was something that amazed us! We watched a LOT of episodes when I was pregnant...and we know that she recognized that from the womb!

The Office has so many likable characters...and so many characters that can make me feel uncomfortable!! But that is what makes me laugh!

Of course, Lee and I love the relationship of Pam and Jim...and amazingly...Lee is my Jim.

I am thankful that the whole series is on Netflix...and Lee and I binge watch at night after we put the kids to bed. It's like those afternoon lunch dates that we had years ago.

Life looks a lot different than it did 7 years ago...

I couldn't have predicted the adventure we would be living now!! But living by faith then taught us that we can continue to live by faith now...and our faith has to keep growing in order to keep up with the adventure!

God doesn't want us to stay the same...the faith I have now is stronger because of the faith I had at that point in our lives.

It's just a sweet reminder that comes along each time we watch an episode (or 2 or 3 or 4) of the office...

Guest Post:: I Prayed for this Messiness - Melissa's Story

I'm excited to say that this is my first guest post!!! 

I've known Melissa for several years...and thanks to social media, we've been able to keep up with each other's lives! She's been a huge encouragement to me in my blogging world...

I saw this post on Facebook, and it inspired me...

*In the comments, she corrected it herself by saying that she wouldn't want it any other way...

And after talking to Melissa and reading her blog Hannah's Oath, I decided this would be the perfect opportunity to have my first guest post on my blog!!!


So, here is a little from Melissa - she's telling her story of why the messiness is so valuable to her now...

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We have been married for 5.5 years. We were married for about 2 years when we started trying to conceive. We tried and prayed and prayed for almost 2 years to have a baby naturally....I then finally went to go see an obgyn and then a fertility specialist. We went through about 6 rounds of fertility treatment. Finally on the 7th round, we had an intrauterine insemination along with some fertility meds and then got pregnant after 3 years of praying and hoping. We couldn't believe it!!! 

All the heartache I had endured for those 2+ years finally melted away. Well, actually I think I was in denial that I was pregnant for a while. After many yeas of heartaches, it was hard to change my mindset. I had spent so many years watching my friends have their first, second, third children...the countless baby showers, menstrual periods, failed fertility treatments...they were all so very painful. And not to mention, i am a labor and delivery nurse, so i was surrounded by it all the time. i felt so alone and isolated. I felt even Jeremy couldn't understand my pain. 

I often pray now that God will never allow me forget those feelings, because I want to always remember where He has brought us from. He is so very good. He gave us our angel!!!!

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Thank you, Melissa, for sharing your story!!! You can read more by Melissa by checking out her blog Hannah's Oath...(and she has a super cute layout too!!! :)

If there are any ladies or couples out there who are struggling with the longing caused by infertility, please feel free to leave a comment (even anonymous) or email me...I'd love to pray with you about your personal journey...

37 Weeks & Counting

Currently my stomach is quite lopsided. I just made Lee get up from his chair to see from the top how crazy this looks. The right side of my huge belly is sitting high while the left side looks like it could be empty.

I'm happy that this baby is moving...

I thought I was going to have to call my doctors' office on Wednesday because I hardly felt the baby move all day. I'm supposed to do "kick counts" 3 times a day...and the baby is supposed to kick like 10 times every few hours. And normally, I don't have to count more for more than 10 minutes...sometimes 5...sometimes 2. But Wednesday was different. I hardly felt her move at all...even at the usual 5:30 am Zumba session that happens in my uterus.

I'm not going to lie. This pregnancy has had me scared more than the last 2. Not just my own miscarriage, but knowing that women have lost babies at 37 weeks...up to even 39 weeks...right at their due dates.

And I can't help but wonder if that would be me too...

We've prayed for a happy, healthy baby and pregnancy...we've been believing for it. And I do feel like God has so much to show me through this surprise baby.

But I still do wonder...and try not to worry. Days like Wednesday don't seem to help those feelings.

Through it all, I am still trusting God. I am believing that I will naturally go into labor and deliver a perfectly healthy baby. And we'll come home and be a family of 5...2 parents raising 3 world changers.

This weekend makes 37 weeks. That means I have 3 more weeks to go. Bella was 10 days early...Brennan was 1 day early...we'll see what this kid does. I'm now considered full-term...so it could be any day now! That's crazy!!!

The baby has made up for that slow-moving Wednesday. She's alive and active....making my belly jump. Lee & I went on a date on Tuesday night...and we had Five Guys burgers and fries...and maybe she was in a carb coma. Yes, I said "she..." Even though I'm uncertain...I can't keep referring to this baby as an "it."

More than ever before, I realize how much a person's life is a miracle. No matter what stage or age, a human being that is alive and breathing is a miraculous thing. It's something that I don't ever want to take for granted.  This pregnancy has definitely made this more of a realization in my own life.

What if It's Not a Girl...

I am currently doubting the ultrasound determining the gender of this baby...

I don't know why...I can't seem to accept that it is a girl. I mean...they aren't 100% when they do these things...and although it looked like a girl...I just don't know...maybe I was secretly hoping for a boy and can't get over it...

It hasn't helped that when I go for my regular check-ups now, the heart rate is considered a boy rate (which is slightly slower than a girls)...and it has been...so much so that the nurses have asked if I'm having a boy...not much of a confidence booster there!!!

One of the nurses told me that is an old wives tale...but most of my pregnancy symptoms have been similar to my pregnancy with Brennan instead of Bella, which was why we went into our ultrasound convinced that we were having a boy!!

I'm at 35 1/2 weeks. I could go into labor in a week and a half and have a full-term, healthy baby.

And, of course thanks to this wonderful preggo insomnia, I'm awake at 5 am (and have been for over an hour now)...and this "feeling" of uncertainty is driving me crazy! And I really have no one to talk to about this paranoia! :)

I'm even looking into the imaging centers in Denver to have another ultrasound done!!! (OK, so I'm not really going to get one...but I'm thinking about it!)

And part of...ok, all of the pressure I'm feeling is brought upon myself...I am in control of how I respond to these feelings...and I shouldn't let anyone else be the determining factor of how I feel...

Getting things ready...having a name picked out...what to bring to the hospital.

Really, none of that matters. I'm not a huge fan of "gender neutral" things, but what I already have has been used by both my little girl and little boy - except for the plethora of clothes that were mostly given to us.

Either way it goes, this baby will be fed, clothed, and have a place to sleep...which is pretty much all that is required. And I am sure I'll go into labor naturally...and I have no clue whatsoever when that will be...

And I plan on bringing girl and boy clothes to the hospital with us. Last 2 times I lucked out...well, kinda...

Bella was so tiny...the clothes that I had brought for her were all too big...even the newborn dress she came home in was big on her!

So, I assumed that Brennan would be a small baby. Not at all. I just remember rolls everywhere. The first thing I said when they laid him on me was, "Oh my, that's a big baby..." And the clothes I had brought for him were too small! I had one outfit that fit him, luckily...or he would have come home naked! :)

Anyways, this baby Blakney #3 has been a surprise all the way around. God has a purpose and a plan for all of this...the pregnancy, the baby, our family...even to the point of timing...I'll be having a baby around the same time that I had a miscarriage last year...and I believe God's timing and will are perfect...

So, I know that this is not worth stressing about.

If you are thinking of sending a gift or something to us...diapers and gift cards are much appreciated!! I do plan on finishing our registry at Babies R Us this week. There will be quite a few gender neutral things on it - just in case!!

And we don't mind at all if you wait until after the baby is born to pick it out!

8 Things about This Stage of My Pregnancy

1) I'm exhausted...and even though I'm tired, I can't always sleep...Insomnia haunts me at night - really at about 5 o'clock in the morning...and I just can't seem to catch up.

2) My weight gain is the best it's been in 3 pregnancies...I've only gained about 20 something pounds and I have 5 weeks to go.  My other 2 pregnancies were pushing 40 pounds (possibly more) by the end...

3) I'm more active than I was for the last pregnancy. I walk about a mile regularly to our neighborhood park with our kids. I go up and down stairs multiple times a day...and I'm chasing a mischievous little boy who seems to get into everything he's not supposed to if I'm not in the same room as he is.

4) I feel like I know what to expect. I have aches and pains, but I know that they are different from the contractions I had when I was in labor the last 2 times. I'm pretty sure I'll go into labor on my own, and I will know when that is based on the type of contractions I have.

5) I feel like I know what to expect after the baby. I'll not be as worried as I was with Bella...and nursing, schedule, sleeping...I'm prepared for all of that. And if breastfeeding doesn't work, I'm not afraid at all to switch to formula. I'm not waiting.

6) I have a plan on how to make sure I feel good before and after the baby...thus the new hairstyle, my skin care regimen, and even clothes (thanks to Goodwill!), are helping me feel confident about myself before the baby comes, which I think will help me with the baby blues afterwards too.

7) I am very confident in my new doctors and hospital. Moving 1400 miles away from great care is hard...especially our pediatrician...he is a wonderful man whom we miss dearly...but we've found a new pediatric office that I like. And my personal doctors are wonderful as well. This was a huge concern when moving here, and God has taken care of this completely!!!

8) Lee and I have spent more time together since we've moved to Colorado than we have in a long time. We're working together to make things happen for Connection Church, which I am thoroughly enjoying...and then we both have individual responsibilities to take care of. But, we still have to work on communicating clearly as well as taking...no, making time for our marriage. Dates don't happen unintentionally...we still can misunderstand each other...and even feel a little neglected...but we know that to have a happy family, we MUST take care of our marriage.

It's been an interesting adventure. We weren't planning on having this baby at this time at all...and it's weird to think that I'll be having the baby around the same time that I had a miscarriage last year. It's all showing us that God is in control...and we are trusting His plans over our own. And I have peace in that. I know He knows what He's doing....He's taking great care of us. And this little world-changer in my belly is going to bring even more joy to the Blakney family!!

Not Just Pregnant...But Feeling Very Pregnant

I've been feeling very pregnant lately. Very.

I've been able to get around and about pretty easily until now...and I can't say that I felt this way so early on in my last 2 pregnancies...It just means that I'm getting closer to the end!

I'm at 31 weeks...almost 8 months...the final trimester.

I haven't had any unusual complications, but I've had the normal complications associated with pregnancy! Aches and pains, nausea, heartburn, insomnia, trouble getting up or sitting down...

I asked my new doctor about it...and he said that it just sounds like a normal, healthy growing baby.

On the good side, I've only gained 17 pounds so far this pregnancy...the last 2 pregnancies were much higher than that at this point...and at the end...we won't even talk about that.

But, I'm also a lot more active this time around. I have 2 kids to chase around. And we moved into a 2 story house...and both bathrooms are upstairs, so I'm burning lots of calories going up and down those stairs!

But this baby girl is pretty active...she moves a lot, and of course it is when I'm trying to sleep! It's good to know that she's moving, and she's healthy...

I feel humbled and honored that God has chosen Lee & me to be the parents of another baby. My heart breaks as I hear of or read of other parents who have miscarriages, still born babies, or even lose their children at a young age. I wonder how it can happen...especially after my own early miscarriage...and if I let it, those thoughts can grip me with fear that I will lose this baby too. And honestly...I think that is part of the reason I've had such a hard time deciding on a name.

But Lee & I are trusting God for a happy, health baby. We know that God has a purpose for this child...I mean, we weren't expecting this pregnancy at all...but we are trusting Him that He knows what He's doing, and that He's going to take care of us and this child.

So, just about 9 more weeks, and we'll have another baby here! I'm filled with excitement and anticipation of what's ahead! Including announcing her sweet, little name that will fit her perfectly!